It is an unavoidable truth that death is part of life. However, experiencing bereavement can feel deeply painful, overwhelming, and disorientating. Many people describe grief as something that feels “unnatural” or “wrong”, particularly when emotions are intense or prolonged.

In reality, grief is a natural psychological and emotional response to loss. Although it can feel distressing, there is no “correct” way to grieve and no fixed timeline for healing.

This article explores:

• Common emotional experiences during grief
• The psychological impact of bereavement
• Practical coping strategies
• When to seek professional support
• How Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) can help

What You Might Feel During Grief and Bereavement

Grief is highly individual and influenced by personality, culture, beliefs, and the nature of the loss. While everyone experiences it differently, research shows there are common emotional responses.

Common grief reactions include:

• Shock and disbelief
• Denial or emotional numbness
• Guilt or regret
• Anger or frustration
• Deep sadness
• Longing or yearning for the person who has died
• Gradual acceptance over time

These emotions do not follow a linear pattern. You may move between them unpredictably, or experience several at once.

The Psychological Impact of Grief and Loss

Bereavement can affect both emotional and physical wellbeing. For some people, the intensity of grief can feel overwhelming and persistent.

Common experiences include:

• Feeling as though the person is still present
• Searching for reminders of the deceased
• Sleep difficulties and fatigue
• Reduced motivation and concentration
• Loss of interest or pleasure in daily life
• Physical symptoms such as appetite changes or tension
• Feelings of guilt or self-blame
• Anger directed towards self, others, or the situation

For many individuals, grief can also affect future thinking, making it difficult to imagine life moving forward.

Five Evidence-Based Ways to Cope with Grief and Loss

These strategies are grounded in psychological principles, including Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), and are designed to support emotional processing and adjustment.

1. Acknowledge grief as a natural process

Grief is not a sign of weakness or dysfunction. It is a human response to attachment and loss.

2. Practice self-compassion

Avoid placing pressure on yourself to “move on” quickly. Healing takes time and is not linear.

3. Prioritise basic self-care

During grief, essential routines such as eating, sleeping, and hydration can become disrupted. Supporting your physical health helps emotional recovery.

4. Accept support from others

Social connection is protective during bereavement. Accept help from trusted friends, family, or community members.

5. Express emotions safely

Talking, journalling, or sharing memories can help process grief and reduce emotional suppression.

When to Seek Professional Support

Grief does not have a fixed timeline. However, you may benefit from professional support if:

• Your grief feels unmanageable or persistent over time
• You are unable to carry out daily functioning
• You feel stuck in intense guilt, anger, or hopelessness
• You are withdrawing significantly from others
• You feel life has lost meaning

Seeking help is a personal decision. Speaking with a GP, trusted person, or psychologist can support clarity around next steps.

How a Psychologist Can Help with Grief

Psychological support can provide a structured and supportive space to process loss.

A psychologist may help you to:

• Normalise grief responses and reduce self-judgement
• Explore and process painful emotions safely
• Work through guilt, regret, or unresolved thoughts
• Rebuild routines and emotional stability
• Maintain a continuing bond with the deceased in a healthy way
• Gradually reconnect with meaningful activities and future goals

Approaches such as CBT can help identify unhelpful thought patterns that may intensify distress and support more balanced coping.

Call to Action

If you are struggling with grief and would like professional support, our clinicians at CBT Professionals can help you navigate bereavement in a safe, supportive environment.

You can:

• Speak to your GP and request a referral
• Download our Referral Fact Sheet
• Contact CBT Professionals to arrange an appointment

Support is available, and you do not need to go through grief alone.

FAQ

What are the most common emotions during grief?

People often experience shock, sadness, anger, guilt, longing, and eventual acceptance. These emotions can appear in any order.

How long does grief last?

There is no fixed timeline. Grief duration varies depending on the individual, the relationship, and circumstances of the loss.

Is it normal to feel angry after someone dies?

Yes. Anger is a common and natural grief response and may be directed at the situation, others, or oneself.

When should I seek help for grief?

If grief feels overwhelming, persistent, or significantly impacts daily life, speaking with a psychologist can be helpful.

Can CBT help with grief?

Yes. CBT can help identify unhelpful thought patterns, support emotional processing, and assist in rebuilding routines and meaning.

Is it normal to feel like I am not coping properly?

Yes. Many people feel this way during grief, but there is no “right” way to grieve.