February 4, 2014

Top 10 Tips for Parent Self-Care

Children are like the barometer of family tension. If your kids are irritable and frustrated, no doubt you have been irritable and frustrated. If your kids have been speaking rudely, sure as eggs you’ve been stressed and shouting. Parents set the mood of the household, and for this reason, I believe it’s paramount that as a parent, you are taking care of yourself. Here are my top 10 tips for parents on how to take care of yourself so that you’re least likely to “flip your lid”. 1. Eat Regularly – hunger is certainly a trigger to “flip your lid”. Try to ensure eating six small meals per day, and don’t go longer than 3 hours without eating something. 2. Eat the Right Foods – the […]
January 31, 2014

Improving Couple’s Communication – Using Time-Out

Time-Out Using a “time-out”, just as a sports coach would – signalling a “T” with their hands and taking time out of the game to re-think and re-structure a game plan – can be an effective communication strategy to manage couple’s escalating communications. The 6 steps to taking a “time-out” 1. Recognise that you are experiencing an internal build-up of intense emotion (i.e., anger). Pay attention to the physical indicators your body is sending you. 2. Say to the person you are dealing with “I am beginning to feel………………….” and “I need to take some time-out. I’ll be back to talk about this when I have calmed down”. If you find your level of anger is beyond being able to communicate this message effectively, simply signal time-out with […]
December 14, 2013

The 7 C’s of Resilience

Dr Ginsburg, child paediatrician and human development expert, proposes that there are 7 integral and interrelated components that make up being resilient – competence, confidence, connection, character, contribution, coping and control. Each of these 7 C’s are explained briefly here and in our child and youth resilience group program, our sessions have been crafted carefully in order to include content and group processes that will enhance each and every one of the 7 C’s. 1. Competence – is the ability to know how to handle stressful situations effectively. It requires having the skills to face challenges, and having had the opportunity to practice using these skills so that one feels competent in dealing with situations. Our groups offer stress-reduction and social skills training and by learning these […]
December 11, 2013

Child Resilience – Why it’s Important!

It is every parent’s dream that our children will go through life happy and healthy, free of pain, worry, and hurt. We would love for our children to not ever have to contend with bullies, peer pressure, divorce, failures, strangers, injuries, disease or death, poverty, crime, or war. However, we live in a less-than-perfect world and life is going to throw us curve balls, involve ups and downs, challenges and stresses. It’s understandable as parents we want to protect our children from these challenges – wrap them in cotton wool, and immunise children from disappointment and stress. But if we did that, how would they ever experience the satisfaction of facing a challenge? Revel in success of facing a struggle, failure or rejection? Appreciate good fortune […]
December 11, 2013

Improving Couple Communication – Setting “Ground Rules”

Suggested communication “ground rules” for handling issues within your relationship: 1. When we are having trouble communicating, we will use the Speaker-Listener Technique (see my blog post “Speaker-Listener Technique” from last week). 2. When conflict is escalating, we will call a “time-out” or “pause” and either (1) try talking again using the Speaker-Listener Technique, or (2) agree to talk about the issue later, at a specified time, using the Speaker-Listener Technique. (For more information on using “time-out”, see my blog post next week). 3. We will completely separate Problem Discussion from Problem Solution. 4. We can bring up issues at any time, but the Listener can say, “this is not a good time”. If the Listener does not want to talk at that time, he or she can suggest […]
December 3, 2013

Improving Couple Communication – The Speaker-Listener Technique

One of the best things you can do for your relationship is to develop the confidence that you (as a team) can deal with whatever issues come your way. Good communication can help you deal with the day-to-day obstacles that most couples encounter, and it is a skill you can learn.   The Speaker- Listener Technique  Use this technique to discuss emotionally sensitive issues. Practice with easier topics or neutral issues first before discussing more difficult issues.   Rules for Both of You The Speaker has the floor. Use a piece of cardboard/rug to stand on, so you would literally have the floor! Use a real object to designate the floor such as the TV remote or pen. (The floor has also been referred to as […]



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